As many of you who’ve tried to contact me recently have known, I’ve been off on medical leave, with an automated text message on my business line stating this.
Today I’d like to share a bit about what I’ve been dealing with, and what steps I’m taking on the road to recovery.
As I’ve shared in previous posts, I’ve struggled with anxiety and panic disorder most of my life. Whilst I’ve generally been able to deal with these conditions by natural methods, the stresses of this year overwhelmed me, both mentally and then physically.
The year started off with fear of this unknown virus and fear that this could be a life threatening plague. Soon after realizing that it was actually not all that serious, the lockdowns started, prohibiting me from working at all. This of course introduced fear for basic survival; how am I going to be able to keep a roof over my head, or food on the table? And the more the “powers that be” kept pushing this fear narrative when in reality the numbers were being manipulated, tests were inaccurate, deaths that had nothing to do with covid were being counted as covid deaths, etc. This created a fear of, what is this really about then? What nefarious plan is this government really trying to pull off? (By the way, if you still count on the controlled mainstream media propaganda outlets for the news, ie CNN, Fox, etc., I’d stop now and tune into the RBN network for the Truth; republicbroadcasting.org)
In addition to the fears and stress created by the insanity going on in the world, I had some personal issues also that caused me great duress; my Father’s worsening Alzheimer’s, the sudden and unexpected death of my beloved cat, (which hit me just as hard as the death of any loved one would have), and finally my mother informing me that her husband has been diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer and was given 4-6 months. My mother lives in Florida, and when her husband passes she will be alone down there. I began to think about planning to move there, when my lease is up in two years. And just the thought of planning a big move like that was quite stressful.
All of these stresses and worries became too much for my body to physically handle. On the 13th of June, after several days of a bad migraine, I found myself waking up out of sleep with my heart pounding so fast I thought I was having a heart attack, sweating, and shaking. It was like I woke up out sleep and into a panic attack, which usually doesn’t happen. I took my emergency medication that I usually only use when having an extreme panic attack, and tried to go back to sleep. It seemed to work at first, and I briefly fell back to sleep, but then continued to wake up in the same condition several more times. The next day I felt sick to my stomach and seemed to be dealing with a bad episode of IBS; another condition I’ve dealt with for years and frequently accompanies anxiety disorders.
So, I followed my usual protocol of clear fluids to recover until I could progress to soft bland foods; but the problem was I never got to that phase. I was experiencing constant nausea and a complete loss of appetite. Even the thought of trying to eat anything made me more nauseous. So I tried to keep taking in liquids, Boost shakes, smoothies, and this liquid meal replacement product I found on Amazon called Liquid Hope. But even this was a struggle; I would feel painful and bloated for hours after just consuming a Boost shake. And I began to feel so weak I could barely get out of bed.
Finally I decided to go see my doctor. And my doctor promptly sent me to the Emergency Room. There they did bloodwork and urinalysis, ran a CT scan on my abdomen, tested me for Covid, and gave me IV fluids. After all this, they found nothing wrong, diagnosed me with IBS and sent me home with a prescription for anti nausea medication and told me to follow up with my regular doctor. I did follow up with both my primary care physician and my gastroenterologist, more tests, but still no answers. And I still felt just as bad, couldn’t get down any solid food, struggled everyday forcing myself to consume these liquid meals, and still felt so weak I couldn’t walk from my bedroom to the kitchen without feeling like I was going to pass out. There were points I literally thought I was dying.
I wasn’t getting any answers from the mainstream doctors so I decided to consult with a Medical Intuitive and Naturopathic Doctor. Finally I got some answers, and found I was dealing with Epstein Barr recurrence, Adrenal Fatigue, and low stomach acid in addition to the IBS. I was informed how to heal these conditions with both supplements and natural foods. I began incorporating these foods into my smoothies and ordered some supplements from Amazon, and I began to feel some improvement. But the real game changer was when I began to work on the low stomach acid issue. I read the Dr. Axe article about low stomach acid that was sent to me, and purchased a supplement called Betaine HCL with Pepsin and Gentian Bitters, by the company Doctor’s Best. This was like a miracle pill; I took it the first day before each of my liquid meals that contained protein (it must be taken with a protein containing meal) and the next day I felt 90% better. The nausea was gone, my appetite returned and I was able to eat solid food, and I even felt like some of my strength was coming back.
It all made sense; without enough stomach acid, your body is not going to want to take in any food because it will just sit there for a long time causing pain and discomfort, and it also makes you unable to absorb any nutrients from whatever food or liquids you do consume, so it just goes into the gut undigested and putrifies, hence the reason I was so weak and dehydrated despite taking in liquid nutrients.
And of course one of the primary causes of loss of stomach acid is stress. Along with the other two conditions, Epstein Barr is the virus that causes Mono. I had mono when I was 18, and it’s one of those viruses that never actually leaves your system; it goes dormant and can reactivate due to physical or mental stress, leading to feelings of exhaustion, and can even evolve into Chronic Fatigue Syndrome if left untreated. And finally, our adrenals produce our stress hormones; cortisol, adrenaline, noradrenaline. Basically our fight or flight response. But this response is not meant to be going on continuously, so when we experience prolonged periods of stress, they begin to function inadequately. In addition to our stress response, these glands also control metabolism, blood sugar levels, blood pressure, salt and water balance, and the balance of estrogen and testosterone. So when these glands get over taxed from prolonged constant stress, it can throw off our physical health in a multitude of ways.
So, with all this knowledge, the proper foods and supplements, plenty of rest and self care, I am on the road to recovery and hope to be back to work in September. I’m planning to see a hypnotherapist on the 15th to help with my anxiety, and plan to be much more mindful of my physical and mental health going forward.
The moral of this story is, don’t let stress take over your life for extended periods of time; take time for self care, seek therapy, seek help from whatever sources bring you comfort, because prolonged mental stress can and will shut down your physical body.
I hope to be back to 100% health very soon, so I can help all of you reduce the stress in your lives. 😊
Please send prayers and healing energy, I gratefully and graciously appreciate it. 🙏